From Diva to Disaster in Days
Dutch translation
Okay, people. Let’s talk about my latest foray into floral folly. My husband snagged this GORGEOUS dahlia at the market last week. We’re talking a showstopper, blooms the size of my head (well almost) and enough color to rival a bag of Skittles that exploded in a clown’s pocket.
Fast forward to this morning. My “diva” dahlia is more like a “kaal” catastrophe. (For those of you who don’t speak Dutch, that means bald. Because apparently, my plant speaks Dutch and has a serious case of passive-aggressive.)
Leaves?
Gone.
Flowers?
Totally gnawed.
Did I overwater? Did a rogue squirrel hold a grudge against my prize bloom? We don’t even have squirrels here in the city. Hedgehogs maybe. Did the dahlia itself just decide it wasn’t feeling the whole “garden life” thing?
In the meantime, I’ve duct-taped a motivational message to the pot (“YOU GOT THIS, DAHLIA!”).
But here is the thing: husband says snails took over and destroyed them right in our garden!
Well duhh snails next time please go to the neighbors, they got a much prettier garden you know.